Why you should want to know more

So you caught a glimpse of a flogger in your Settlers of Catan host's closet. Maybe your co-worker had a pair of cuffs, and not the fuzzy kind, fall out of her purse. Maybe your best friend's dog came from the bedroom carrying a ball gag.

Of course I'm going to assume you responded maturely and didn't judge them, but suddenly all that Fifty Shades of whatever color that is again, has raised it's head in your world and your reality. Do you want to know more so you don't have to be worried or uncomfortable, or simply ignore the whole thing? Keep in mind, kink/BDSM is not just in the bedroom, sometimes it's not even about sex, and it is becoming more and more mainstream.

Don't worry, it's not so bad! Read, ask, Google, but do not watch porn to understand something that very much so happens in real life! (I never thought I'd have to type that sentence, but unfortunately the need is real.)

Like any other extreme action (skydiving, cave exploring, living off the grid) practicing BDSM can be, if done with proper knowledge and training, relatively safe. Indeed, some aspects of BDSM are not dangerous at all.

So go ahead, look around. There are hundreds, maybe thousands, of BDSM sites on the internet.   Just remember two things: as with anything else you read on the internet, take it with a grain of salt, and there are no hard and fast rules, there is no such thing as one "true" way to practice BDSM.

I have been living a BDSM lifestyle for the last 8 years and, like many, have had the occasional incident where my private life and my public life accidentally collided. Fifteen years ago no one would have understood the slight collision, and most likely we all would have moved happily on in our own worlds. These days there's just enough information to make non kinksters nervous, and fear of something never brings about a positive response.

I will be posting articles as I can write them. Feel free to contact me if you have any questions or would like an article about a specific topic.

Good luck and have fun in your seach!